Greeting, Earthlings.

I sexually identify as an alien. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of traveling across the universe anally probing disgusting inferior species. People say to me that a person being an alien is impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install abduction beams on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Ayy Lmao” and respect my right to abduct cows from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a xenophobe and need to check your earthling privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.